A Guest Author Who Desires to Remain Anonymous

I received an email from a friend who trusts me enough to share some very deep and personal thoughts. Save for one other person, I'm the only one who knows the intricacies of her feelings. Some of her email has been edited; however, per our conversation, she allowed me to reveal certain parts of it.

"I've been reading your work at the Lounge lately. Tonight, I dumped a raw emotion into my personal journal about a man I met, and thought of the Saphyre Lounge. My sweet Blu, this man may not be the one... or even end up "my man"... but he's sure of the position he wants in my life... andI know I'm drawn to him...Please consider including this in the Lounge as writing from "A Guest AuthorWho Desires to Remain Anonymous."

I've decided to fulfill her request as I think others could relate and possibly benefit from her experience.

I dedicate it to the first deep "comeback" attraction for divorced women...

His voice causes my body to betray me.
When he says my name and calls me lovely,
my dreams complete a circle ofintimacy.
When he speaks of spending time with me,
my heart leaps at the chance that
raw desire can follow healing after a divorce.
But his assessment of me reveals the fear
locked in my mind when he pauses to call me "Gypsy."

**The Betrayal**
My entire being knows and believes the necessity of celibacy.
God's plan for man and woman is perfect is design.
But his voice is like a presence that occupies the warm air around my body.
The experience is like sweet lovemaking.
I'm afraid to meet him beyond the telephone...
afraid he'll discern thedeeper temptations.
Our first two meetings were enough for now.

**The Dreams**
Before I sleep, I smile at the way he vibes my name.
My name has never sounded that way before.
My dreams are full-color experiences of sexual intimacy.
I awaken with full knowing
that his attention whispers to what is "woman"inside of me.

**My Leaping Heart**
I am annoyed that he interrupted the solitude of my single life...
remindingme that I'm not just a daughter, mother, or domestic robot.
The simplicity of my daily routine was broken when
the "man" of him called me to be "woman" again.
I had settled into single life after divorce
without a care forcompanionship.
My heart leaps, but my mind fights
his bittersweet reminder of the potential for love.

**Gypsy is My Name**
Unable to contain the war inside,
I tell him the truth.
"The minute I really start liking you, if that happens,
I will simply stopreturning your calls."
He pauses and declares me a Gypsy.
We laugh and go on - both with secret thoughts.
He thinks I am serious.
And I think that I may be too late
to escape the warm and sexy attraction of"him."